Characters played by Paul Merton
Narrator
Characters played by Neil Morrissey
Jack
Characters played by Adrian Edmondson
Dame Dolly
Characters played by Griff Rhys Jones
Baron Wasteland
Characters played by Denise Van Outen
Jill
Characters played by Morwenna Banks
Goldilocks
Characters played by Julie Walters
Fairy Godmother
Characters played by Julian Clary
Tim
First Henchman
Characters played by Peter Serafinowicz
Second Henchman
Characters played by Will Barton
Harp
Characters played by Vince Williams
Pat the Cow
Characters played by John Willett
Pat the Cow